How can I feel less anxious and more assertive? Most people don’t even know I’m not confident in myself

How can I feel less anxious and more assertive? Most people don’t even know I’m not confident in myself

There are so many people who seem so confident and sure of themselves, making decisions and getting on with their daily challenges, that you wouldn’t even suspect that they are feeling extremely anxious and vulnerable on the inside. For every task, there are countless doubts, insecurities and fears. And that can be exhausting and lonely, dealing with those emotions, without anyone knowing about it.

Why do I feel so sad and in a low mood for no reason?

Why do I feel so sad and in a low mood for no reason?

We all have ups and downs. Life isn’t a linear state and if your mood changes from one moment to another, it means that you are alive and open to your feelings. However, sometimes it feels that the low mood is taking over. From the moment you wake up, there’s that darkness and inexplicable sadness in your heart. You feel heavy and your mind seems filled with negative thoughts. What’s going on? What’s wrong with me?

We all need some space. It’s ok to be alone and do nothing sometimes.

We all need some space. It’s ok to be alone and do nothing sometimes.

There’s so much pressure to be doing things, going out, meeting friends and having fun. And, with social media, the pressure has increased, knowing what other people have been up to, all their busy social schedules and lots of activities planned way in advance. There’s almost a sense that if you are not out and about, you can’t possibly be enjoying yourself. But is that really true? Can’t you be happy and content on your own, doing things that you actually find fun? Or doing nothing at all?

What is Psychosynthesis?

What is Psychosynthesis?

Called by some as 'Psychology of Hope' or 'Psychology of the Soul', Psychosynthesis sees the individual beyond their personality and current situation, allowing for what is trying to emerge in them and achieving their full potential. Psychosynthesis is a therapeutic approach that aims to facilitate & guide the individual in their journey of growth, self-realisation and self-actualisation. It is a transpersonal model, giving attention to the Soul, to the person's potential for the Future and to greater aspirations of higher nature, such as compassion, altruism, intuition and creativity.

Everybody is talking about Self-Care. But what is it all about?

Everybody is talking about Self-Care. But what is it all about?

We live in a fast world. Being busy is the rule and ‘doing’ is the norm. We feel guilty if we are not producing, achieving, showing results. There’s a pressure to be constantly in action. Either at work or during our time off. Even socially, it feels as if we have to be always doing something: meeting people, going to places, keeping up with events. But where is all that pressure coming from? Who is actually asking you to live your life like this?

Don’t suffer alone, whatever you are going through. Why reaching out for help is so important.

Don’t suffer alone, whatever you are going through. Why reaching out for help is so important.

I hear so many people apologising for their suffering, as if their troubles aren’t ‘bad enough’ or worth paying attention to. As if other people’s problems were always more serious than theirs and that they ‘shouldn’t complain’. And my answer is often the same: ‘How do you measure and compare suffering?, ‘Why are you not deserving of attention?’, ‘Why isn’t your suffering important?’.

Why does separation hurt so much? The emotional stages after a breakup

Why does separation hurt so much? The emotional stages after a breakup

If you are going through a breakup, separation or divorce, you might be feeling sad, distressed, angry, or perhaps numb, lost and confused. If the decision to end the relationship wasn’t yours, there might be feelings of rejection, insecurities, low self-esteem, low self-confidence and vulnerability.

The Reality and Life Changes after having a baby

The Reality and Life Changes after having a baby

It doesn't matter how many times people tell you that your life will totally change after having kids. It doesn't matter if you have seen your friends or relatives doing it. Most people think: 'It will be different for me!'. And... surprise... Having children totally changes your life. Fact. And the changes happen in the most unpredictable and unexpecting ways. You will not know how it will affect you, as an individual, and affect your relationship, as a couple, until you experience it for yourself.

‘Midlife crisis’ can happen at any age. What to do if it hits you?

‘Midlife crisis’ can happen at any age. What to do if it hits you?

Some call it ‘existential crisis’ or ‘life crisis’. And it can happen at any stage of your life. It’s that moment when you look in the mirror and ask: ‘Is that it?’. Or ‘What’s the point of this?’. Or ‘What am I doing with my life?’. Those thoughts can make you anxious and feeling lost. Not knowing where to go or how to take the next step.

Never feel guilty for having a break. The importance of going on a holiday & truly switching off.

Never feel guilty for having a break. The importance of going on a holiday & truly switching off.

If you ever panicked and overworked on the days leading to your holiday, you are not alone. Sometimes it feels like you will be leaving for months, years, and nobody else will be able to cope without you or nothing will be done in your absence. Worse still, you might feel they will cope too well and you might be replaced. All in the space of ONE single week. 

Why Counselling can be so powerful. And why I admire the ones who reach out for help.

Why Counselling can be so powerful. And why I admire the ones who reach out for help.

It takes courage and strength to face your problems and reach out for help. It’s not an easy decision and it will likely involve talking about things that you would probably prefer to forget about. But, as most of us might have noticed, ‘forgetting’ is impossible and doesn’t really help.

Do you feel stuck? What to do when you are frustrated and just want to give up

Do you feel stuck? What to do when you are frustrated and just want to give up

Sometimes you feel you are going nowhere. So much work, so much effort, and no results. Either in your relationships, at work, or in your own self-development. Totally stuck. And it is frustrating, because you want solutions. And you want them now.

Why can’t I find ‘Mr or Mrs Right’? The eternal search for the perfect relationship

Why can’t I find ‘Mr or Mrs Right’? The eternal search for the perfect relationship

The idea of finding that person who is absolutely perfect still persists. The hope of meeting someone who ‘ticks all the boxes’, with common interests, no big flaws, and with added physical and intellectual attraction, puts most single people in an eternal hunt for ‘love perfection’.

Why do I feel like I am a different person at different times? Understanding the several parts of ourselves

Why do I feel like I am a different person at different times?  Understanding the several parts of ourselves

‘Why am I so confident sometimes, and the next moment I act like a small child?’ ‘Why do I feel so vulnerable and lost in certain situations? And in others I am a control freak and in charge?’ ‘Why do I feel so intimidated by that person, but so authoritarian when I am with that other person?’‘Who is the REAL me?’

How to stop old repetitive behaviours and achieve real changes in life

How to stop old repetitive behaviours and achieve real changes in life

Many times you behave in ways you don’t want to. You might react to people, say or do things you didn’t really mean, making impulsive decisions, and then regretting them almost immediately. ‘I wasn’t myself!’, ‘I don’t know what took over me!’. In those moments, there is an intense feeling of not being in control of your own actions.

You are not your job

You are not your job

The sad reality is that, more and more, people are too identified with their jobs. Their sense of self, of who they are and their external image, is intrinsically linked to what they do for a living. They get validation from praises at work, they find happiness when they receive compliments, their satisfaction and rewards come in form of bonus or promotions.

Are you tired of hearing ‘be the best’, ‘become a leader’, ‘be happy’, ‘you can do it’?

Are you tired of hearing ‘be the best’, ‘become a leader’, ‘be happy’, ‘you can do it’?

There is a lot of pressure nowadays to ‘be happy’ and to ‘be the best’. Lots of expressions initially designed to serve as an incentive, a motivation, are turning into unrealistic expectations and making people feel worse about themselves.